My dearest Debra Kristi,
Oh how I miss you … let me count the ways. I miss your wonderful smile and the bubbling joy of your laughter.
Sept 6:
I am miserable without you but have arrived safely in England for my visit with CC MacKenzie. Let me tell you a little bit about that sod CC. To ease my heartache, I called her Mum, but instead of cuddling me to her breast, she told me to man-up, then forced me to pose in her greenery. You know how plants make my eyes water and my nose run. I miss your care, dearest Debra. May I call you Mum when I return home?
Oct 1:
After a long lonely journey across the vast ocean, I have reached the shores of Canada and entered Lisa Hall-Wilson’s domain where I’m fighting for my life…and my dignity. Remember the days when you tickled my tummy and called me “your boy”? Oh Mommy, dearest Debra, when will this torture stop so I can come home?
Oct 8:
From the Great Lakes to the Prairies, I’ve arrived at my next destination in time for the Canadian Thanksgiving weekend. Unfortunately, I’m stuck in a post office bin, freezing my tushie off. <sob> I’m so lonely for your arms!
Oct 9:
Am finally at the Seabrook residence. No doubt, you weep for my safe return. Serves you right! I’m sucking it up, being your brave boy and dreaming of the day when I’m once again nestled in your arms. Sheila took me to town where we got massages. Separate rooms, of course. Even though I’m mad at you, I would never cheat on you, my dearest Debra. Goodnight, my love. Dream of me and I will dream of you. {photo deleted}
Oct 10:
My heart still aches for your smile, my dearest Debra, but this morning I woke muchly refreshed and decided I may never speak to you again. Next trip, you’re packing your bags and I’m staying home. Sheila introduced me to my new neighbors whom I’ve nicknamed Babs 1, 2, and 3. While the fireplace warmed my feet, the three Babs read me Sheila’s latest release Wedding Fever, a spellbinding tale of lost love, buried treasure, and a ghost that will steal your heart. Best story ever!
Oct 11:
Today, I wiped you from my mind and spent a lovely morning writing in quiet solitude with my new BFF Sheila, then headed out to visit with her mother who, incidentally, let me call her Mum (take that CC MacKenzie!). Mum served me milk and cookies and called me HER boy. I may never leave…
Oct 12:
Today Sheila showed me her rock quarry, in case I wanted to wield Thor’s hammer, but seeing as how it’s a wee bit nippy out there, I chose to stay inside and spend my time with Babs 1, 2, and 3. I’ve made the decision to extend my stay at the Seabrook residence, maybe indefinitely. Not that you’ll even notice I’m gone.
Oct 13:
Just time to dash off a quick note. Dear Debra Kristi, I’m in heaven and am writing to tell you that I’m moving on. Please pack my things and send them to the Seabrook residence (address enclosed). Sheila has promised to make me feel like one of the family. I’m in love!
Oct 14:
We had brussel sprouts for supper tonight, Debra. You know how I hate those green things. It’s like I’m eating feet…
Oct 15:
The men here are sissies. Apparently I’m expected to wield the vacuum with the same finesse I wield my hammer.
Oct 16:
My dearest, darling, beloved Debra … Please forgive my peevish attitude of these last few weeks and take me back.
Oct 17:
The honeymoon is over. Last night, I escaped the Seabrook house and made it as far as the corner post office. Although my box is securely taped shut, I live in constant fear that crazy Seabrook bitch will discover my betrayal and force me back home to wash her floors and dust her cobwebs. I live for the day when you and I are finally reunited.
P.S. Have I told you how much I love you? And I promise not to call you Mommy … ever!
P.P.S. I’m digging through the post office mail, searching for a U.S. stamp so I can mail myself home. I’m about to commit a felony, all in the name of our love. If I get caught, please promise you’ll come visit me in jail. Sheila will certainly give you directions.
P.P.P.S. Unable to locate the proper postage, I’m resigned to continue my journey to the western coast of Canada. But first I must hide the evidence of my betrayal. I have burned this letter along with all the other letters in the post office. I’m unharmed, thanks to my protective shield.
P.P.P.P.S. As you can see, I really didn’t burn the letter. I’m saving it in case I change my mind. For now, the mailman has arrived and saved me. North Saanich, here I come…
Your loving he-man, Thor
Love it! Oh Thor, you never know what you have until it’s gone. *giggle*
Melinda VanLone recently posted..Settling In… Moving On
LOL, we had so much fun during his stay. Too bad he left me.
That was a cool little trip he took and I enjoyed the “diary” feeling.
I’m enjoying his journey, Patti, and can’t wait to see pictures from his next stop on Vancouver Island.
LOL! Love the “letter.” In the rock quarry picture, I swear I thought his index finger was folded down at first!
Jennette Marie Powell recently posted..WANA Wednesday: Fun Reads for the Young and Young-at-heart, plus ROW80 update
I love Thor, but if he can’t do laundry or clean house, he’s not welcome here either!
I know, Tracy. Can you imagine him objecting to those simple little chores? What a guy. I think he needs a wife.
It was cold outside so we were in a hurry. Since downloading the picture, I’ve looked at it several times and thought the exact same thing, Jennette. Thor does know how to express his feelings.
Haha!
I gave that boy everything I had, sob. I adored him – and his big hammer. Lara was not enough for him, was she? And look at him with not just one Barbie, but – hang on till I count them – THREE! The slapper.
You know, Melinda, you’re quite right. In that photo with the rocks he looks as if he’s giving us the finger.
Send him on, Sheila!! Where’s he going next?
CC MacKenzie recently posted..BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID
It’s true, CC, we give him our everything and he still leaves us. I wonder what Debra Kristi has that the rest of us don’t? Hmmm, should’ve asked him while he was here.
He was actually giving me the finger. Poor Thor was freezing his b*lls off.
If I told you I might lose him to one of you along the way.
Just saying. It’s a well guarded secret.
Debra Kristi recently posted..Did Thor Write Me a ‘Dear John’ Letter?
So true, Debra. Guard the secret carefully.
Gods, so fickle! Head’s turned by blondes named Babs and suddenly poor Debra is a distant memory. Unless Sheila, it was all a plot to get him back to Debra by having Thor do such menial chores.
Great post, Lol!
Serena Dracis recently posted..Weird Weekend – Ancient Megalithic Cultures
LOL, Serena. Yep, that was my plan all along.
LMAO! LOVE IT! I’m so sorry my dear Thor. Miss you much, my love.
Monkey misses you more. It is a great thing you do, traveling and spreading the joy with others.
Sheila, adore this post. Fabulous! The rock quarry picture – oh my gosh. Too funny! And here I thought Thor was a tough guy. Seems you have uncovered his soft underbelly. Hehe
Thor will be thrilled you and Monkey miss him, Debra. I’m sure he’s found an internet connection at one of his Post Office stops and is checking this post for your reaction. I can see him now, gleefully doing a jig and shouting, “She still loves me!!!”
Thanks for sending Thor to my house, Debra. Even though he abandoned us in the middle of the night — without saying a word, I might add — we enjoyed his stay and found him to be witty and smart and an all round great guest.
Great post, Shelia…um, I mean, Thor.
Loved all the PPPPPPS’s.
Having recently watched the movies Thor and The Avengers, I really enjoyed catching up on Thor’s journey.
I haven’t seen the movie yet, Stacey, but am looking forward to it. Glad you enjoyed our post.
Poor Thor! I did not get to see this side of him. Just so you know – Lara says it’s his broken heart talking. He wanted her to return with him but she refused.
When you’re hurting that bad you go back to what you know I guess…
Lisa Hall-Wilson recently posted..Defending Against Road Rage
And here I thought he was just lonely for Debra. lol. Well, now I understand why he treated the Barbies as “just friends”.
Thank you for the big laughs today Sheila!!
Coleen Patrick recently posted..Literary Hobnobbing: Let Yourself (and Your Dreams) be Seen
You’re welcome, Coleen. Glad you stopped by.
OMG! That is too funny! Thanks for the laughs.
Rhonda Hopkins recently posted..Release Day: TALES FROM THE MIST
If Thor was still here, he’d say, “You’re welcome, Rhonda Hopkins.” So glad you stopped by.
I can’t wait to see what’s next and find ways to host Thor in Texas so that he isn’t bored or crying for Debra.
Diana Beebe recently posted..A Vampire, a Jackal, and a Spot All Walk into a Spider Web…
Yes, the crying was … can I say embarrassing for both Thor and myself. Looking forward to Thor in Texas, Diana.
Thanks for the giggles. Thor can stay at my house any day….but he will have to do chores.
Well, I can attest that he won’t do chores, Nickie. He ran at the first sight of the vacuum.
Sheila … what an amazing journey … Thor the Nordic God … so appropriate for our Canadian Princess. May he visit you again soon and will you let us know the next leg on his journey? Thanks to you and Debra for this post
Florence, Thor is headed to North Saanich on Vancouver Island. He should arrive there any day now. I’m looking forward to hearing about his visit. I doubt he’ll be back this way. I scared him off with the vacuum.
Love this! What an adorable post. Sorry to see that Thor is, after all, just a typical male though. Housework is women’s work… Sigh.
I really tried to change him, Kristy, but then what do they say about changing your man? Just don’t do it. lol.
Great post Sheila. what fun. I’m so glad you introduced Thor to our Canadian prairie weather. I’m not surprised about the vacuuming and suting though. You know how those divas are.
Louise Behiel recently posted..Depression: It’s More than Feeling Sad
Yes, so hide your vacuum when he arrives at your house, Louise.
Eventually, Thor will learn real he-men vacuum. What troubles me is his mum/mommy fixation. I recommend a therapy session with Louise Behiel.
Excellent idea, Pat. Thor in therapy. You know, he’s heading to Calgary soon, so hopefully Louise will help him address his mum/mommy issues.
Oh. My. Goodness. What a super fun post! I knew that Thor had issues, but really? Wow? He needs to take a trip to visit Louise Behiel. She’ll help him deal with his issues in a healthy way.
I’m looking forward to the day our Thor visits my Northern California home. Oh the fun we’ll have!! I think.
Patricia Rickrode
w/a Jansen Schmidt
Patricia recently posted..“I’m Watching That!”
Can’t wait to see what mischief Thor and you get into, Patricia. Perhaps by then he’ll have had a chance to sit down with Louise and talk out his problems.
I’m laughing to hard to form words. LOL! I love it, Sheila. I mean he-man/Thor.
I don’t blame you for pining over Debra, Thor. She’s a hottie inside and out!
August McLaughlin recently posted..Self-Publishing with an Agent: A Viable Option?
I know, August, I feel so sorry for him. If he had only let me know, I would’ve arranged a Skype call between Thor and Debra.
*giggle* Oh my, poor Thor *giggle, snort* Sheila, I’m speechless! *giggling until tears are running down my face*
Lynette M. Burrows recently posted..Art Glass Lessons for Writing
One of my favorite parts is when he claims he burned all the letters in the post office, but his protective shield saved him from harm. Oh, and then there’s his desire to call CC Mum. Thanks for popping in, Lynette.
Sheila Seabrook, you are hilarious! I am roaring with laughter. I just popped onto our WANA facebook page and couldn’t resist your post. I am so glad I didn’t miss this. One could see that it could be dangerous for you to be locked up for extended periods of time Sheila. Be afraid, be very afraid. LOL! Good to know that Thor is headed to Calgary. I think he is going to need several sessions with Louise in order to detox/recover from Christine, Lisa and you girl. Actually, I don’t think Thor will ever be the same. Debra, to be forewarned is to be forearmed. May the force be with you Thor!
Thank you Sheila for this. I really needed the laugh.
Sometimes we just need silly fun, don’t we, Karen?
I am checking my mailbox daily in anticipation of Thor’s arrival! I guess I won’t be serving brussel sprouts or asking my handsome house guest to vacuum, though! Thanks for the fun post!
Sally, I’m looking forward to your visit with Thor. Hopefully he won’t spend all his time whining about his visit to my house. Lol.
Priceless, Sheila. You and Thor had such a good time together. Too bad that he got afraid of little dust and “un-manly” tasks and escaped. I can’t wait to see where his adventures take him. And how Louise will deal with his mommy issues when it’s her turn.
Reetta Raitanen recently posted..Link Feast, vol. 25 – NaNoWriMo Special
Ah yes, those mommy issues are huge. LOL. I can’t wait to see what he does on the rest of his world tour!
ROFL. Glad I can use the excuse that I’m retired to get out of doing therapy with Thor. Louise, he sounds like a tough case. Definitely Mommy issues. This is beyond hysterical, Sheila!
Glad you enjoyed it, Kassandra. Thanks for popping in.
LOL
Thor has been on quite an emotional journey, hasn’t he? Can’t wait to see where he winds up next!
He’s headed to Vancouver Island, Laura, and I’m anxious to see what kind of trouble he gets into there.
That was so great, Sheila! I was laughing the whole way through. I’m so glad Thor decided not to call Debra ‘Mommy’ anymore. That was a little creepy!
He sure did drop Babs 1, 2, and 3 pretty darn quick. That Thor doesn’t know the meaning of long-lasting love, does he? Thanks for the super fun visit with Thor.
Glad you stopped by, Tameri!